Gogo Skhotheni on second marriage – ‘My husbands live separately and we have a schedule’ She was still in the honeymoon stage when she started getting dreams from her ancestors telling her she needs to take a second husband.
Now that she has, she prays daily that she doesn’t get a dream telling her to take a third.
Her second husband joined her family about eight months ago and it certainly has been an adjustment.
Gogo Skhotheni, real name Patricia Tumi Motsoenemg, is a Moja Love reality star. She never saw herself entertaining multiple partners and never thought that she would be in a polyandry marriage because she has always been a one-man woman.
Even her husband knows that he married a faithful wife who only has eyes for him. But her gift comes with a lot of dreams and visions which impact their marriage.
She only got married two years ago, and instead of enjoying her honeymoon phase, she got a dream that instructed her to get another husband.
On her reality show on Moja Love, Gogo Skhotheni shared that her first husband was not happy to receive the news that she was going to marry someone else. But he ended up understanding.
Her second husband is not a stranger but someone she had crossed paths with in the past. They had a relationship for a year when she was in Grade 8 and it ended the following year. After school, she had constant visions about this person that she didn’t pay attention to, but they persisted until she had to do something about it.
She didn’t want to break up with her first husband. She says even though this tested their marriage, she had to remind him why they met and why they are together and finally got into an agreement. Her husband understands she loves him, she adds.
Gogo Skhotheni says the request caught her off guard because her second husband wasn’t someone she would’ve expected to be sent by her ancestors, but she had to obey.
“Even if you can check him out, he is not like my husband or someone I would go for but he understands that my ancestors want him to be in my life.”
She says she never saw herself being married to two men because she has always been a family person and her husband was even shocked that she has to take another husband.
“I didn’t see myself where I am today, at first it was a bit weird but I am enjoying it because I do not have to hide anymore and it is not like I am cheating, what I am doing is there, it has a name it is polyandry, I am not cheating anymore,” she says.
“I know this person from a long time ago and I fell in love and then after the visions, the dreams and the confirmations, me and this person would see each other more and then I cheated with him.
“But because of my gift and it not allowing me to partake in vat en sit, I told him that we need to get married and also I couldn’t continue to cheat on my husband.”
She says it was not an easy task to break the news to her husband but he eventually had to understand. “I am not leaving my husband nor am I going to change my surname. The wedding happened already, it is just that I can’t post pictures at the moment because it hasn’t appeared on TV yet,” she tells Drum.
“My husbands live separately and I go to them according to our schedule. When I am not with the other, they know where I am at. We are at a good place and we do not talk about this anymore,” she says.
Gogo Skhotheni says her first husband’s only worry is what if she has another vision that tells her to take a third husband? Then what will that mean for them?
“They feel like I am humiliating them but at the end of the day, my husband explained that he still wants to be with me and he stayed.”
“He feels like this will happen again. If it does happen, it happens, there is nothing that I can do but I pray that it doesn’t happen because I saw how the news about the second husband broke him. If there will be a third one he won’t be able to take it, so I am praying for that. Though I don’t mind the third one, I will do it if it happens,” she says.
Her first marriage is still registered and the second one happened traditionally when the second husband paid for the lobola to her family and everything they agreed on is on paper. She says her first husband’s family had a problem with her having the second husband, they didn’t take the news well.
“My husband’s family kept on having meetings, till this day. They feel like I am humiliating them but at the end of the day, my husband explained that he still wants to be with me and he stayed. There have been some difficulties because he has to explain to everyone including our six kids and it hasn’t been easy because we have old kids who can see what is happening at home,” says Gogo Skhotheni.
She has been married to her second husband for eight months and she enjoys every moment of it. She says all details of her second marriage will be on season two of her reality show.